The modern world faces a crisis of human disconnection: people love to point fingers at technology, blaming our digital devices and extensions as the CAUSE of our lack of fulfillment in our social interactions… but really, what it comes down to is CONVERSATION.
Yep. That’s right. Conversation.
And yet, despite the fact we’ve been having conversations since language began, technology makes it far too easy to invest time and energy elsewhere. As a result, we end up feeling lonely. When we converse, we tend to treat it like a transaction. We aren’t PRESENT.
We are waiting for the other person to finish so we can share our story. We use people as mirrors, overlooking whose there in front of us (same goes for behind a screen). So how to keep a conversation going in a way that continues to provide real value and fulfillment for each person involved?
Well, this is a problem that many people both online and in-person. When they are trying to meet someone new then after a few minutes there comes an awkward silence and the conversation just seems dead.
Most people struggle with this and they think that they have some sort of social problem, however, that isn’t really the case. They just don’t know how to keep a conversation going and if someone doesn’t know this then it can affect their social life.
Here are some basic yet solid techniques that can help you continue a conversation:
You might have heard this more often. Always be natural and yourself. This is a basic yet useful technique to keep a conversation going. When you are checking with yourself in your mind that “If I ask this or say this then would I sound cool?” This is a mistake that most people make, they act like someone they are not and eventually, the other person catches up because that person is not stupid, everyone catches up when you’re being unnatural and not yourself. This makes the other person less interested and eventually, the conversation dies!
Take Interest In What Other Person Is Saying
If you’re checking your phone or starring here or there then it would make the other person feel like that you’re not interested and he/she will just try to end the conversations.
No one likes being ignored and when you are not taking an interest and ignoring someone then it will usually lead the conversations to a dead end. When talking with someone, always make them feel like you’re interested in the conversation and keep your mobile phone in the pocket.
Make sure that you’re listening to what the other person is saying and take an interest in the conversation.
Tell Different Stories
Stories can juice-up conversations and make them interesting and while most people tend to include stories in conversations but a mistake they make is that they talk about stories from their own lives only. Yes, you should talk about stories from your life but you shouldn’t make the entire conversation about yourself.
Tell different stories that you saw happened or that you heard about on TV or Radio or Social Media. These make the conversation interesting. But keep in mind that when telling a story, make it interesting. There is a complete art of storytelling and you should have some idea about it.
All stories are interesting to some extent but the way you tell it makes it more interesting. So, work on that too.
Avoid Making Dead-End Statements
If you want a conversation to keep going then you should avoid giving dead-end answers or statements that just end the conversation. A dead-end statement or answer makes the other person feels like you’re forced into the conversation and not interested to keep it going.
To make a conversation keep on going in a proper flow, avoid giving any dead-end answers or statements. When you make a dead-end statement then the other person has really nothing to top it off or to continue the conversation with.
Answers the questions in an interesting way that the other person can top it off and continue the conversation with another question or you can also answer the question in such a way that you’re not only answering the question but also cross-questioning the other person.